Fainting couches

I'm not getting enough compassion from my husband as I near the final stretch of my daily radiation for breast cancer.

My big mistake was declining his offer to drive me to the treatments.

Because he's retired and gets up at noon, and my treatments are at 9 am, I said, "No, you don't have to drive me.  I can find a parking place and go in myself.  It only takes fifteen minutes to go in, change to a hospital gown, get the radiation, get dressed again, and leave.  It would be nice to be dropped off and picked up, but you don't have to do that."

Being tough and independent is my usual pattern.  Maintaining a stiff upper lip worked for a few weeks, but now I'm actually tired as a result of radiation and not taking time for an afternoon nap.  

I forgot to communicate the change in status to my husband.  He hasn't asked, "How are you feeling?"

I haven't sat him down and said, "Look, this radiation is getting to me.  I need some support." 

Instead, I've gotten irritable and he has continued to yell at me whenever he feels like it--for example, when I turned on the dryer with his wet clothes in it, but he didn't want them dried.

The solution: a fainting couch.  

I found these couches mentioned in the preface to a new book by Susan Campbell, Tempest-Tossed: The Spirit of Isabella Beecher Hooker, and I took the hint.

Turns out they are for sale at Macy's and everywhere else on the internet.

Today I took a big dramatic nap in the bedroom, but tomorrow I'm ordering one of these plush red fainting couches and having it moved into our living room.

I can't say there's been any change yet, but here's hoping.

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Search Results

Fainting couch - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fainting_couch

Wikipedia

A fainting couch is a couch with a back that is traditionally raised at one end. The back may be situated completely at one side of the couch, or may wrap around ...

Fainting room - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fainting_room

Wikipedia

A fainting room was a private room, of which its main features/furniture werefainting couches, used during the Victorian era, to make women more comfortable  ...

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Day 19 of Radiation

Sheesh!  Enough already.

I still have four more days of radiation to go... 

At this point my left breast is a sad puppy: bright pink and droopy and tender.  When I brush against or bump into something, it reminds me of being  a nursing mother and having to drive home from a days's work with tender cement blocks on my front, overfilled with milk.

I want to tell the radiation folks, "Thanks---this will be enough for me." 

Oh well, I guess dropping out is not allowed.

My energy level is low but I keep bumbling around trying to do things instead of just resting.  As a result, things take longer and the choices I make are not as good.  Short circuits in the frontal temporal lobe.

The good news: I hope to start the drive to Colorado on Aug. 1.

Also on that day I start taking Arimidex, one a day for the next five years.

Yippee, I'm on The Pill again.  Not.

At least I don't have to do chemo therapy. 

Radiation, Day 14

Today I completed my 14th radiation treatment.

I lay down on the narrow white table while the three-foot wide screen with its high-pitched hum added a zzzzzzzz in about middle E and aimed invisible rays at my left breast.

It moved across me from right to left and continued to buzz at me from the lower left, aimed at my armpit and the left side of my breast.

That's what the treatment is like every day; I will have a total of 23 of those expensive treatments (covered by Medicare).

Then three male technicians did some talking and measuring to prepare for the seven booster treatments that will begin next Wednesday.  Dr. McCloskey came in and checked on whether they had the right location.  

With her okay, they drew an large oval on my left breast and then took a photo of it.

I changed from hospital gown into my clothes and left.  

In a good mood, I decided to sit on the patio and check my cell phone while waiting to see if my car's oil change was completed.  

Because I was outside when I made that decision, I had to step over a couple of four-inch edgings to get to the patio.  (From inside, I could simply have opened a door to the area.)

Looking toward the patio, but not at my feet (one of which is wearing a huge black soft cast), I stumbled on one of the little edgings and nearly fell.

No big deal, right?  But it was the same kind of stumble that had put me in that cast for the past two months.  Realizing that I had done it again--I had not learned my lesson--caused me to burst into tears.  I sat on the patio and cried.

At home, I took off my shirt and stared at my left breast: pinker than the right, tender, slightly swollen.  Also the underarm area (near where two lymph nodes had been removed) showed a rectangular pink imprint.

For the first ten treatments, the zapped breast had not showed much difference from the other one.  Now the radiation is finally having a visible effect.

Of course, the scar from the lumpectomy is still red--a dramatic little unhappy smile.  At least it's no longer looking infected.  There's still a small red spot where the biopsy needle entered in April.  The incision in the underarm has faded to a pale thin line. 

I squeezed some Miaderm radiation relief cream out of the tube and gently soothed it onto the whole left breast.

14 down, 9 to go.

Good news on BRCA 1 & 2

I called my doctor today to find out whether the results of my blood test are available yet.

She said it was negative for the BRCA 1 and 2 genes.  

That means that I don't need to have a mastectomy or double mastectomy.  Hooray!

Instead I will be starting radiation on June 30, five days a week for 4-6 weeks.

On June 23 I will do the prep for radiation, including getting four dots tattooed on the precise area where the x-rays will be aimed.  That will enable the technicians to direct the radiation exactly to the right spot each day.

When she heard about the tattoo, Roz teased me: "Wow, Mom, you're finally getting one!"  (I was not too happy when she acquired a rose tattoo and then a butterfly as a teenager.)

I'm so grateful that she and her sisters now don't have to worry about having the breast cancer genes, at least not from me!